Breaking all the rules

As many of you know when you become pregnant you are inundated with information, from books to friends & family to strangers ~ all of them telling you the proper way to raise your children, all of them giving their advice on food, sleep, bath, play etc. etc. etc.

I certainly asked for my fair share of advice once I found out I was having twins.  My main question – how the hell was I going to survive raising twins?  Because seriously I have heard the horror stories of women trying to survive raising one baby how would I do it with two.  Would every hard thing be doubled because there were two babies?  Would I get any sleep at all?

One bit of advice I did receive and I actually listened to was from my sister – she has 3 kids, all of whom I love to death and absolutely adore the Beans.  As you can see here:

Story time

Constructing a toy for the Beans

Her sage advice – “Do whatever works for you and whatever gets the babies to sleep, which means you get sleep.  Ignore whatever everyone and every book is telling you.”

She was right.

The rules I have broken are as follows:

  • No bumper pads in the crib – that worked for about 4.5 months when I could no longer handle my little girl crying every time she bashed her head against the crib.  This girl has been crawling since 4 months and while sleeping she seems to be auditioning for Cirque du Soleil
  • No sleeping in the family bed ~ this works now but in the beginning and after many many nights of no sleep it was about survival, occasionally the Beans would be sleeping on our chests in bed just so that we could get a couple hours of much-needed sleep.
  • No solid food until 6 months – that was fine until about 5 months when I could no longer keep up with their demand for food – they happily gobbled up their Rice Cereal
  • The argument about nipple confusion – breastfeeding twins, that’s all I have to say about the introduction of a bottle of formula or pumped breast milk pretty early (yes some are able to exclusively breastfeed twins but I was not)
  • Pacifiers – I have a love/hate relationship with them.   I hate when they wake up looking for them and are crying until I give it back to them but also loved the fact that when they were both really upset at the same time and since I only have two arms it sometimes gave them a few minutes of comfort while I figured out what the hell was wrong with their sibling
  • Never wake a sleeping baby – in theory wonderful, in practice (well my practice that is) if I wanted to get any sleep then the babes were put on a schedule and if one woke up in the middle of the night to eat, the other was put to the boob as well, this went on for about 4 months when my girl just wanted to sleep so then it became whoever woke up to eat, ate.

I’m sure I have broken many more rules than I can remember but everything that I have done that goes against what I’m “supposed” to do was about survival ~ I’m sure it was a better idea to actually survive the experience of newborn twins with some semblance of calm than to be a raging sleep deprived lunatic.  You know the saying “A Happy Wife = a Happy Life” – I’m sure a happy mom = happy kids is also true.


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Filed under Beanism, Mayhem, Me, Rules, who am I

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