Monthly Archives: March 2010

How do we do it?

With the recent school stabbing in our area it got T and I thinking about the Beans future.  How do you make sure that as your children get older they understand to walk away from physical confrontation?  Fights aren’t fights anymore.  Fighting involves guns and knives now.  When I was in high school, and when our parents were in school, fighting involved fists and maybe a foot or two, now “kids” resort to real violence to settle their disputes.

How do you teach your kids the right lessons along the way so that they know it is far better to walk away from these types of situation while still keeping their dignity.  I don’t want my kids to be bullied, I don’t want them to be picked on and teased.   I’m also all for standing up for oneself and for what you believe in, but not at the expense of your life.

How do you give your kids the right foundation to become what they want, what they are good at, what they are passionate about without sounding like a preacher?   How do you teach them to respect each other and oneself?  How do you make sure they love their sibling, parents and family.  How do you make sure your kids talk with you about anything?  How do you do all this without becoming a parent that your kid hates.  I know all of these hard decisions are in the future for the Beans but shouldn’t we start now with giving them the love and attention they deserve.  Does a happy child make a happy adult? 

You quickly realize when you become a parent that you have this precious being that you have to be so careful with.  What we do now and in the next few years is going to shape who they become.  How can we make sure we don’t screw that up?


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Filed under Beanism, Family, Me, T

An Unwanted Invitation

So the other day my neighbour drops an invitation in my mailbox for a ladies gathering (I say lady cuz my neighbour is an “older” woman, ie. retired and a grandmother).  Now I really like my neighbours (a sweet retired couple on one side and a police detective and his family on another).  BUT, it’s an invitation to one of those parties.  You know the ones where they sell kitchen stuff, or beauty products or jewellery or sexy lingerie.  The ones where you feel obligated to buy something even if you don’t want or like the products.

I want to be in a neighbourhood where the neighbours talk, gather for BBQ’s, help each other out and are generally social and nice to each other, but I really don’t want to get roped into buying all of this stuff just to be nice.  I give the neighbourhood kids the requisite candy money, (even though I have yet to find that bloody kid selling the yummy chocolates that Jen O. teased and taunted me about), and I sponsor them for any sort of fundraiser, but I really hate those other things.

Now this ladies gathering is benefitting a good cause and I support and like the cause.  So my question is, can’t I just give her some money, I get a tax receipt and we call it a day without me having to go there, eat cucumber sandwiches and make nice with a bunch of ladies?


Filed under Family, Me, who am I

Why? Seriously why?

T has been away since Sunday afternoon, it’s just me and the Beans (and Nanny too for part of the day).  The Beans have been in great moods, playing, laughing, chasing each other and generally happy little tykes.  That was until about 10:30 last night.  T was supposed to get home much earlier but in the land of never-ending delays and cancellations that is NYC his 1:30 flight didn’t actually leave until 7. 

Sunday, the Beans slept all night without a sound.  Monday, the same thing, two lovely sleeping babies not making a sound.  Tuesday, yep another repeat performance by the Beans.  Last night, nope, that didn’t happen.  It was almost like Sebastian knew his Dad was home.  T was home for 15 minutes and then Sebastian starts crying and not just whimpering or complaining but an all out cry, a cry that required I drag myself out of bed to see if I could settle him down. Sebastian didn’t want me though, nor did he want his soother, he kept swatting me and his soother held no interest to him so I left him to figure it out for a while.  From 10:30 until 6:30 Sebastian was up 4 times, why, tell why?  Was he calling out for T, was he punishing us for T not being here?  I don’t know but I don’t like it. 

I gave Sebastian a serious talking to this morning, told him that just cuz Daddy’s home doesn’t mean he has to be up to greet him.  He can wait until a more respectable hour – you know like 8 in the morning, we’ll call Daddy at work and you can say hello.  Sound good??

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Filed under Beanism, Mayhem

Peeping Tom

So I’m in the middle of Day 3 with Nanny and am wondering if I should become one of “those” mothers.  I say “those” mothers in the nicest way possible because I have nothing against them and might just turn into one.  I’m talking about buying and hiding a “Nanny Cam” somewhere in my house so I can make sure that what I see, feel and experience while here with the Nanny is the same when I’m back at work.

I’m trusting the Nanny with the Beans but doesn’t that mean I should also trust that she will provide quality care for my kids without being “Big Brother” and check up on her.  Such a dilemma because then what if she found the camera?  Would she be insulted and leave, would she understand my neurotic craziness and chalk it up to first time parent syndrome?  I went through hell to find this nanny but now am going through hell wondering if I should spy on her.  That would drive me crazy if I was spied on at work.

Do you have a nanny camera?  Does your daycare provider have CCTV in their home/centre?  What would you do?


Filed under Family, Mayhem, Me, Nanny, Weirdness, who am I

Really, me?

So I’m in my office trying to catch up on some emails (more like my daily blog reading) and I get my little update from My Tornado Alley (more like a few updates cuz I’m signed up to receive them by email, RSS, my WordPress Dashboard etc.), I really can’t stand to miss out on something.   Now this weekend I was singing “Ain’t No Sunshine When She’s Gone” cuz Jen O. didn’t update us on Saturday with her poop du jour story, which is a damn shame for her daily readers (she doesn’t really write about poop everyday, just some days).  But now she’s back and hopefully will continue with her daily updates but today was special, cuz there’s sunshine when she’s back and she even shares the sunshine

Now I’ve won awards for many things, (not really but just want you to think that I’m kinda cool), but an award based on Sunshine is my favourite kind, I just wish the award came with sunshine, we really need it, I was starting to get depressed with all the cold grey weather we’ve been having, but no longer, I’m a happy girl. 

Now in keeping with the rules I’m going to give a shout out to some of my favourite people:

  • Sara at The Valliers – whenever she writes I laugh out loud and I think she’s sunny.
  • Karla at Untangling Knots – I really wish she would write more often.
  • Nicole  over at Resolving Timeline Issues – I’m a newbie to her site but love that bad grammar bugs her ~ even though my grammar sucks.
  • Krystle from Starting Young – it’s never easy starting young
  • And The Fab Brunette well because I’m also a fab brunette, love coffee, paris & cupcakes, maybe we’re twins from another mother.

To the award winners, please share the sunshine! Here are the rules:

1. Put the logo on your blog or within your post
2. Pass the award on to five bloggers
3. Link the nominees within your post
4. Let the nominees know they have received this award by commenting on their blog
5. Share the love and link to the person from whom you received this award.


Filed under Me, Someone actually reads me, The Abyss, who am I


Nanny’s first day with the Beans just ended and I couldn’t be happier.  She’s a lovely lady, reading and playing with the kids, keeping things neat & tidy and helpful around the house.  I’m breathing a huge sigh of relief right now.

The Beans were crawling into her lap for story time, giving hugs and kisses and plenty of smiles.  Today was worth all the crap I’ve gone through in the past few months to find her.

But last night, oh man what a disaster.  Not two minutes before the Beans were to be put in their cribs for night-night there was a catastrophe involving broken glass, blood, bumps on heads, hysterical babies and a vacuum cleaner (this in it of itself is reason for hysterical babies).  A glass snow globe (yes I know, why do I have something glass in their bedroom) fell off their dresser for reasons still unknown to me, instead of just falling on the carpet it had to fall directly on Sebastian’s head, giving him a pretty good bump, bruise & scrape.  The  bloody globe then had to “bounce” off Sebastian’s head into the dresser and smash into a million pieces, raining shards of glass and sparkles and water everywhere.  What a disaster. 

Thankfully it only took an hour to calm hysterical babies, assess where the blood was coming from (my finger that I’d sliced open), vacuum (a.k.a. torture said babies) and then calm and soothe again.  Let’s hope tonight is less eventful.


Filed under Mayhem, Nanny

T minus 1

Tomorrow Nanny starts at 7am (it kinda sucks that I have to set an alarm for 6:30, I haven’t done that in 15 months).  I’m excited and nervous all at the same time.  We’ve walked down this road before, we’ve had someone start only to not come back for day two.  I can only hope and cross my fingers that this Nanny works out.  I don’t want to be disappointed and discouraged again.  I have two weeks left until I go back to work and the last thing I want to be is worried about the Beans well-being.  I want them to be taken care of, nurtured and loved.  I want to relax and enjoy my final two weeks of being a stay at home mom.

On a positive note, T and I went out last night.  Oh it was soooo nice to be in the company of other adults, drink a glass (or 4) of wine, laugh and just be in the company of great people.  T left this afternoon for four days to NYC so it’s just me and the Beans (and Nanny too) until Wednesday.  Let’s hope the weather improves and the sun returns so we can spend some time at the park.

So keep your fingers crossed for me and think positive thoughts tomorrow, I don’t want to do another post about searching for a nanny, I like this one and want her to stay!


Filed under Me, Nanny