Category Archives: Mayhem


It’s been far too long since I’ve been here. Far too long that I’ve neglected what has been a saviour to me. I began coming here to help me find me and I’m well on my way in that search and rescue mission but feel that there is still a missing person out there. I’ve laughed, I’ve cried, I’ve ranted and raved.  I’ve bitched and moaned and hailed and applauded.  So why have I been ignoring you?  Why have I not found that few minutes a day?  Why have I not let my finger tips tickle the ivories so to speak?

Life. That is why I haven’t been accumulating my frequent flyer miles lately. Life, it’s the other four letter word. Life happens but then nothing happens.  I let LIFE happen, but because of LIFE happening, nothing happens. The life of getting up with the alarm and going through the motions of the day only to end the day no further ahead than when I started the day. Nothing really accomplished, nothing really gained, nothing really cherished, nothing of consequence lost, just nothing.

I spend so much of my time making sure that certain things get done in the way they should, when they should and how they should that I’ve ignored the other side of life.  The side filled with spontaneous fun, laughter, joy, passion and even spontaneous anger.

I was telling T last night that we just don’t have enough time anymore.  Time for the fun that used to be us, but us is now different.  We aren’t just spouses anymore, we’re parents.  Why do so many people (or is it just me) let the old ways die when the new life of parenting has entered our homes?  Sadly, our hunt for more time isn’t going to resolve itself anytime soon.  It might actually start to get worse as the Beans get older and start school, homework, sports, friends etc.  So how do I make sure I find that time? 

What do I give up to get more time? What do I change to get more time?  How can I stop that clock from racing around day in and day out without finding that precious time I and WE need so badly?

Time – I need it.


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Filed under Mayhem, Me, The Abyss, who am I

Exhibitionist & A Vampire

This morning on my way to work our nanny calls me laughing hysterically.  I guess little Miss Sofie was as naked as a jaybird.  Sometime in the night this little devil angel removed her sleep sack, onesie & diaper.  Also, sometime during the night she peed in her bed.  EVERYWHERE!

All things considered, it could have been much worse, she could have been covered in poo first thing in the morning.


Sebastian has also started to bite everyone.  The other day he gave me a great hug and cuddle only to be followed by a vampire style bite to my neck.  I almost dropped him it hurt so bad.  He’s also been biting Sofie nonstop.  He goes in for a nice hug only to follow it with a ferocious bite.  The poor girl has teeth marks on her ankle, thigh, arm and back – how the heck do I stop this?


On another note, tomorrow morning the family is venturing down to Long Island for a few days of R&R with some very good friends.

I’m told the drinks will be ready and waiting for us when we arrive and the weather forecast is the same – sun & heat ~ fantastic! 

We’re so looking forward to this, I just hope our friends are ready for these two crazy kids.

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Filed under Beanism, Mayhem

Nap Time

The Beans have two naps a day right now and at almost 16 months I would think it’s time to change this to one nap a day.  With all this sleep interrupting the day it’s hard to plan things, do things and get out of the house for longer than an hour. 

The Beans sleep from 10 until 12ish, then again from 3 to 4:30 (and they have to be woken up at 4:30).  I’m trying to figure out the best way to get them into a routine of going down for a nap after lunch and hopefully that nap will last for two to three hours.  We’re starting with a slow transition, keeping them up a little longer in the morning and increasing this time every week in hopes of getting them to that nap at lunch. 

The problem though is that some days it is REALLY hard to get them to 10 let alone any later in the day.  Sofie could go ALL day without a nap and typically not be grumpy (she did this when we were in Bahamas); whereas Sebastian NEEDS his sleep and LOVES his sleep (I’m sure if he slept better at night this wouldn’t be an issue, the little Bean is having teething issues right now).

What did you do with your little ones to get them to one nap a day?  Is it really so bad to have two naps a day – I know I would love to be carried up to bed, given a blanket and told to go to sleep twice a day!

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Filed under Beanism, Family, Mayhem

Sleep – what is that?

The past few nights have been rough.  We have a Bean that is not sleeping well, ergo we’re not sleeping well.  I find it amazing how I/We have become so used to the Beans sleeping through the night, so much so that when one or both of them don’t sleep through the night it feels like we’ve (especially me) rewound our lives 15 months and have newborns in the house again.

I need my sleep.  If I don’t get my sleep I become grouchy.  Grouchy might be too nice of a word for it really.  I’m a bitch with a capital B!  I’ve been like this forever and at 34 years old I doubt I’m going to change anytime soon.

I just need to find a solution to our Bean’s sleep troubles.  Any suggestions?


Filed under Beanism, Family, Mayhem, Me, The Abyss, twins

Exciting Stuff

For the past few months I have found a great release here.  I have never been much of a creative person ~ my creative ability resides in the kitchen.  The usual “creative” things that people do (painting, crafting, writing etc.) has never been my forte.  Until now that is.

I have enjoyed writing down my thoughts, ideas, rants and raves here.  I’m able to share the crazy, fun, happy, sad and everything in between here.  I’ve actually enjoyed it so much that I became the Newsletter Editor for the Durham Parents of Multiples.

I might actually be crazy for volunteering to do this because one thing I lack is an abundance of free time, BUT I’m jumping with excitement to put my first newsletter together.

I’ve always had a crazy dream of writing a novel one day, yes this blog and the newsletter are no where near a novel but I like to think of them as my collection of short stories.  I can always have them all prettied up and self publish them and say I’ve written a book so that when I’m old and senile I’ll feel as if I’ve accomplished something and just maybe achieved a dream of mine.

For now I’ll focus on my little collection of short stories and see where they take me.


On another note, does anyone else’s kids like to climb?  Does anyone else have near fatal heart attacks when their kids do something you wish they didn’t know how to do yet?  Mine do – ALL THE TIME.  I have no idea what the solution is to this problem – anyone have a solution for me cuz I’m all ears!

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Filed under Mayhem, Me, who am I

Nothing about nothing

Do you ever get the feeling that you have so much in your head that you’re not allowed to share that you feel like your head just might explode.  I do, RIGHT NOW.  I have so much stuff trapped in the brain that I can’t get out I’m finding it distracting.  In my line of work my motto has always been “I know nothing about nothing”.

That’s how I’m supposed to do my job – well a big chunk of it anyways – but now I have too much stuff in there that I don’t really know but I do and can’t share but I have need to.

I have good stuff, bad stuff, boring stuff, exciting stuff and stuff that really no one would care about if they knew what I know, BUT I’m not supposed to even know this stuff.   Christ, even I’m confused.

I did have a good thing happen today, I wore a pair of shoes I scored while on my shopping weekend that are sexy and comfortable all wrapped up in one.  This rarely happens with fashion.  Fashion doesn’t beget function.  But this time, oh my I’m so excited.   I love my new shoes.  But I don’t love them as much as these two blue-eyed sweeties.

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The past few days have not been fun in our house.  We have had two sick kids here.  Two kids that can’t breathe because their noses are stuffed up.  And because they don’t know how to blow their noses we are left to torture them with our many implements of the nasal clearing variety.  Two sick kids that can’t breathe = two kids that can’t sleep = two parents that can’t sleep = grouchy mama. 

To top all of this off, Sebastian is getting all 4 molars at the same time – really, is this necessary?  Could we not have waited and did one thing at a time?

There are still many moments of cute though.  Sebastian running full speed into my arms with his squeals of laughter and Sofie insisting on climbing onto the couch and sitting there like a big girl with a huge smile on her face.  They are growing fast and accomplishing so many things now.  They love being outside, playing at the park, going for walks and running – oh my they love to run now.  My nanny has said she’s going to need leashes for them when they get to be a little older.  (I was on a leash when I was a kid, is this considered child abuse now?)


Filed under Mayhem